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Are You Lamar's Cousin...A Fan Fable from the Talladega Infield
By Jo Ann Hlavac
Many fans have met Lamar. They might have met him as Bubba, Paul, John or
Bobby. He is always at the race track. He is always lost. We met our Lamar in
the Talladega infield.
It had rained in Talladega for days before race
weekend. We pulled into the Talladega infield on an overcast Friday night. We
are lucky; our race wagon is small and light. We are able to park where other
bigger and more expensive motor homes fear to tread. We pulled into the best
spot we have ever found in an infield.
As we were parking, a guy walked up
and told us; "Bo, you are gonna get stuck. I've been watching people try to park
here all day". He went on his way. At least five other people tried to warn us
about trying to park in the spot we had found. We parked, without getting stuck
and started setting up. Up walked the first guy who tried to warn us. "Bo, I
can't believe you didn't get stuck. I'm impressed."
The guy chatted with us
for a few minutes and went on his way. We continued setting up. Around two hours
later, up walks this guy again. He comments again on how much we have set up and
how he can't believe we did not get stuck. I ask him his name, and he tells us
Lamar B. Something, from Somewhere, Georgia. He has been coming to Talladega and
camping in between turns 3 and 4 with the same group of friends for 20 years.
It seems Lamar did something many people do at the race track. He went
wandering around during daylight without having a landmark to know where his
home was for the weekend. When it turned dark, he was hopelessly lost. All
campsites look the same at night. He had been looking for his friends for hours.
He told us that he couldn't find them, but he couldn't lose us.
Off he went
into the night to look for them again. Lamar finds us three or four more times
while trying to find the friends he has been coming to Talladega with for 20
years. Every time he has a different type of beer in his hands. (Ain't race fans
generous?) Finally around 3 am, he wanders up and asks if he can sit and rest
for a few minutes. Of course, he promptly passes out. I decide to call it a
night and put a sheet out for Lamar. When I come out with the sheet, Lamar has
fallen out of the chair. Half of his body was on the tarp and the other half was
in the mud. It started to drizzle, and my husband, Jim, and I decide it might be
better to cover him with a tarp. Jim says he will take care of it, so I went to
bed.
I fall into a deep sleep. I hear the motor home door open, and I roll
over to see not my husband but Lamar. I look next to me-no Jim. Jimmy is known
for wandering around after I go to sleep.
I am thinking to myself, "Be calm.
You are only in the infield at Talladega in your motor home with someone you do
not know from Adam. Your husband is nowhere to be seen. Stay calm."
Lamar
flips on the lights and starts talking to me like he has known me all his life,
and this is the most normal thing in the world. Thank God the door opens, and it
is Jimmy. Lamar is calmly eating chips he found on the stove and asking if he
can sleep on the cooler in the motor home until morning. He has finally realized
he has no hope of finding his buddies until daylight. We let him stay.
Daylight comes and Lamar bids us goodbye, telling us he will come back
later. We know he won't. He probably did not go more than three yards from his
campsite the rest of the weekend.
This is my favorite fan story for a few
reasons: first, I am Catholic, and we are supposed to give up something we like
for Lent. That year instead of giving something up for Lent, I decided to do
good deeds. That deed covered me until the end of Lent. Second, no matter what
track we are at, if we see someone lost, we always ask, "Are you Lamar's
cousin?" It still gives us a laugh!
Third, we know every time that crew goes
to Talladega, Lamar's friends tell him, "Go find your friends you spent the
night with a few years ago."
At which point he replies, "Yeah, I couldn't
find you guys to save my life, but I couldn't lose Laidback Racing. I know y'all
hid from me on purpose."
Finally, what I like best about this story is it
shows how real race fans always look out for each other, no matter who their
driver is.
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